The Thestral Keeper
by RonsPigwidgeon
Summary: Hermione discovers a different side of Harry at a dance and determines to change his life by the end of the summer, even if it kills her. -- This is a re-edit of a snarrygames story on lj.


**Title:** The Thestral Keeper (or How Harry Got Kicked Out of the Closet)

**Author:** **ronspigwidgeon**

**Pairing:** SS/HP, KS/HP, very brief HP/GW

**Warnings:** um... mild sexual references? Pushy!Hermione?

**Beta:** **brokenanchor**

**Word Count:** 10,071

**Summary:** Hermione discovers a different side of Harry at a dance and determines to change his life by the end of the summer, even if it kills her.

**A/N:** This story was originally written for the 2007 **snarrygames** and your can find it here. I was never particularly happy with the story as it was because I rushed the ending and never got beta'd. So, for the last year or so, I've been working on expanding and improving it, and here is the result. I hope you enjoy this version better than the last!

* * *

After nearly eight years of difficult, exhausting work, the war was over. Voldemort was finally defeated, and the Wizarding World could begin to rebuild. There was celebration and building and planning. Soon, those who had fought so hard for their victory began to move on and start over. Or, in the case of some, begin their lives of freedom for the very first time.

Ron began work as a clerk in the Auror department, though he wasn't an Auror himself and didn't plan to be. He claimed he had had enough of Death Eaters and dealing with the Dark Arts and Harry wasn't going to disagree, though a few of his co-workers were less accepting. There were a few who thought it cowardly of Ron not to want to participate in their work on the field. They were mostly the younger Aurors, those who had looked up to Ron while at Hogwarts, disappointed now that he refused to continue to play the part of adventurer and hero. Ron didn't mind their quips, much, though he had a tendency to push the lighter cases their way, the cases that were least likely to end in a promotion. The more seasoned Aurors understood Ron's disinterest in working with the Dark, having had more than enough of it themselves, and it was these Aurors that Ron got along with the best.

Hermione had been accepted to attend university in the autumn and was making preparations to move to the only Wizarding university in Britain, Merlin College, Oxford. She intended to study history and magical lore, having decided to study the subject after a conversation with Headmistress McGonagall, who told Hermione she was going to try to convince Professor Binns to retire in the next few years as it had come to her attention that he refused to cover anything that had happened after 1895. Hermione had always wanted to be a professor at Hogwarts and the idea of becoming the History of Magic professor and being able to interest the children of Hogwarts in history again excited her. Until classes began, however, she was free to spend her time as she liked, and she concentrated mostly on enjoying herself and spending time with her friends.

As for Harry, he had purchased a large plot of land just outside Hogsmeade and set up a wildlife reserve. At the moment, his reserve was home to the herd of Hogwarts thestrals that had been displaced during the last battle, when nearly half the Forbidden Forest had been burned down. He lived a quiet, solitary life on the reserve, and could only be seen when coaxed out for parties and the occasional Sunday brunch. At first, Hermione had worried that isolating himself from the outside world was unhealthy, but she was soon appeased when Ginny managed to convince him to continue their relationship. Though he rarely left the house, she knew Ginny spent a good deal of her time with him on the reserve and as Harry seemed content enough with her, Hermione's fears soon subsided.

Most of the past few months had been spent at parties and balls honouring everything and everyone from Harry to Neville Longbottom, and the one they were currently attending had been a particularly good bash to celebrate Luna's birthday until it had begun to fizzle out about half an hour before.

At that moment, the music was mellow and slow and the dance floor had thinned to only a dozen or so couples. Ron had been pressured into dancing with Professor McGonagall, and so Hermione was spending her small break watching Harry and Ginny. Something felt off about their relationship and Hermione was determined to discover what exactly was wrong. Ginny had been so happy when Harry had agreed to continue their relationship after Voldemort's defeat, and they looked happy enough together, holding each other close with Ginny's head on Harry's shoulder, but there was still… something. Hermione had first started noticing it a few days before when they'd all met for lunch at the Leaky Cauldron. Harry looked… not quite unhappy, but not completely besotted as he had been before their original break up either. Watching him now, she saw an absent look in his eyes, as though he weren't really there with Ginny at all. He was, of course, there physically, holding her close and gently swaying back and forth, but his eyes were off in the distance, staring into space.

She scanned the general area that his gaze was pointed towards before looking back at him, and then it hit her. He wasn't staring vacantly into space; he was staring at someone across the dance floor. Kingsley Shacklebolt, in fact. More specifically, he was staring at Kingsley's arse.

Hermione gasped, squinted to make certain that she was seeing what she believed she was seeing, and blinked. Harry Potter, her very straight best friend, was staring at another man's arse. And from the way he unconsciously licked his lips, he was rather enjoying the view as well. Hermione didn't know what to make of this. This was the first indication that Harry had ever given that he was interested in his own sex. Why had he never said anything before? For Merlin's sake, why was he still with Ginny? Why had he agreed to continue their relationship in the first place? Perhaps he wasn't aware that he was staring at men's arses appreciatively. She looked over at Kingsley again and had to admit that it would be difficult for anyone to deny the fitness of that bottom. Kingsley was undeniably one of the sexiest wizards Hermione had ever met. And that voice… it made her knickers uncomfortably wet just thinking about it.

She shook the naughty thoughts from her head and turned her gaze back to Harry. So now she knew what was wrong with the relationship. It wasn't that Harry didn't love Ginny; it was just that he was interested in men. Perhaps he was worried that they would not accept him if they knew he was gay, or perhaps he didn't want to hurt Ginny. If that was the case, it was probably best that she disillusion him of those thoughts right away, because remaining with Ginny when he wasn't really in love with her was going to hurt her more in the end than finding out that he was gay and ending things now would. It wasn't as though any of them had ever shown signs of homophobia. Hadn't they all been incredibly supportive when George came out last year? But of course this was Harry who never seemed to get used to the idea that other people could love him and always appeared to be waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Hermione sighed to herself. Well then, if Harry was going to continue to delude himself into believing that his family would reject him if he were gay, then she was just going to have to make him see the truth. And that was exactly what she planned to do. By the end of the summer, Harry would be out and, if she had anything to do with it, in a steady relationship with someone who truly made him happy, whomever that man turned out to be. And if he ended up hating her by the end of it, then she could handle that as well. At least she'd found a way to successfully divert herself from thoughts of university for the time being. Ron would be pleased ─ right after he got over the apoplectic fit he was going to throw as soon as he found out that Harry was gay.

* * *

A few days after the party everyone was gathered at the Burrow for Sunday brunch and Hermione decided to begin her probing. Nearly everyone was crowded into the cramped, little home. All of the surviving Weasleys, Hermione, Harry, With only a minimum amount of sly maneuvering, she managed to corner Kingsley on his way out of the loo without actually appearing to have cornered him at all. He looked a bit startled that she was standing outside the door as he exited, but gave her a friendly smile anyway. "Hermione, you're looking lovely this afternoon."

Hermione grinned back at him, standing up a bit straighter and doing her best to prevent herself from preening as though she were Pansy Parkinson. And really, who could blame her? Kingsley was gorgeous, and that deep, commanding voice was enough to turn anyone's knees to jelly. "Thank you, Kingsley. That's very kind of you to say. How have you been?"

"Fantastic, very busy, but fantastic. And you?"

"Wonderful," she answered quickly, impatient to get to the point. She'd never been very good at faking nonchalance. "You know, Kingsley, I've been wondering about something for ages now. You're an extremely attractive man, if you don't mind my saying so. Why haven't you settled down with a nice woman and begun a family yet? You can't tell me no one is available, because I'm sure there are women lined up around the block." Hermione knew that she ought to be ashamed for having asked such a personal question, but no one had ever accused her of being subtle and she saw no reason to be when there was something she wanted to Kingsley didn't appear to mind, as he let out a booming laugh and held onto the doorframe to steady himself. Once he'd settled a bit, he looked down at her with a twinkle in his eye. "Why Hermione, one would think you were propositioning me."

Hermione was horrified and immediately turned bright red. This was not going well at all; she only wanted to know if he was gay and keen on Harry. "Of course not, I'm practically married to Ron, or I will be once he finally comes to his senses. I'm only asking because I know of several people who are interested and I thought I'd see if they were pining in vain."

He raised a chiseled eyebrow and smirked at her. "Well, if these 'people' you speak of are women, they should look elsewhere, as I am very firmly interested in men only."

Hermione grinned like the Cheshire cat. "I was hoping you'd say that."

His eyes flashed in surprise. "You were, were you? Am I to assume that you have a man in mind for me to 'settle down and start a family with' then?"

"I was thinking of Harry, actually."

This obviously threw him for a loop because he stared at her in shock for several moments before pulling himself together. "Harry Potter, Harry? I thought he was dating Miss Weasley."

"He is, but I happen to have caught him staring at your bum on several occasions. I think he's hiding, and I intend to dissuade him from that. I just want to make sure you're interested before I do. So, are you?"

Kingsley licked his lips and Hermione felt her knees go wobbly again. "Absolutely. That young man has the fittest arse I've seen in a long time."

Hermione grimaced at the thought of Harry's bum. "That's lovely, but please don't give me images like that again. He's practically my brother." She shook her head and then smiled up at him. "Good, then I'll sit him down and have a talk with him and I'll let you know when he's ready for you to firecall. Thank you, Kingsley." She leaned up on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek before turning away, grinning at the very pleased 'No, thank you' that followed her.

* * *

The next morning found Hermione in Harry's living room, brushing soot from her robes and calling out for him. After a few minutes, a messy head of black hair poked in from the kitchen, followed by a disheveled Harry still in his pyjamas. "Morning, Hermione. What are you doing here?"

"I actually have something rather important to talk to you about. Have you had your breakfast yet?" She knew it was useless to try and have a serious conversation with Harry before he'd eaten anything.

"I was just making it, actually. Come, have a seat in the kitchen. Then you can tell me whatever it is you need to in there." He disappeared again and she followed the sound of pans being shuffled about only to find him over the stove, scrambling eggs. A thestral foal was laying on a nest of blankets in the corner, staring at her with its unnerving white eyes, a plaster cast encasing its right front leg.

"What happened to him?" she asked, moving over to pet the skeletal creature.

Harry turned and rolled his eyes with a wry grin. "She's only a few weeks old and not particularly steady on her legs yet. She fell into a hole out in the forest and broke her Canon bone. The hole was only six inches deep, though, so I think she was just being rowdy and knocked herself over. The vet said she'll be fine in a few days." Hermione nodded and patted the foal on the head before going to sit at the kitchen table. Harry joined her a few minutes later with his breakfast and two cups of tea.

"So what is it?" he asked, looking up at her as he began to eat.

She studied him for a moment, hesitant, before stating, "I know your secret, Harry, and there's no reason for you to hide it any more."

Harry froze, fork in mid-air, and stared at her. "What do you mean; what secret?"

"I know why you aren't happy with Ginny. I've seen you looking."

"Looking at what?" His voice was slightly shaking and she felt horrible for having to do this, but she had no other choice. If left to himself, she knew Harry would never admit to being gay, and both he and Ginny would be miserable for the rest of their lives.

"At men's arses." The color drained from Harry's face and he looked away from her. "Harry, there's nothing to be ashamed of. I'm not judging you. I just want to know why you're hiding it. Why you're with Ginny if you're not interested in women."

"I am interested in women."

"Harry, you spent half an hour staring at Kingsley Shacklebolt's bum the other night at Moody's party, and don't try to tell me you didn't. I watched you."

"But that doesn't mean I'm not interested in women. I'm just… attracted to men, as well."

"Then, why don't you act on it? Why are you with Ginny? I can tell that you aren't happy, Harry."

"I love Ginny, why shouldn't I be with her? We're meant for each other, everyone says so."

"You aren't in love with her, though, are you?" She gave him a stern glare when he looked as though he might protest. "Don't you dare lie to me, Harry Potter, you're worse at it than I am."

He sighed and stabbed at his eggs. "No, I'm not in love with her. But that doesn't mean I shouldn't be with her, does it? It makes her happy, and it makes the Weasleys happy. And I'm not unhappy."

"But you aren't fulfilled and you aren't in love, and you deserve that, Harry. And Ginny deserves to know the truth, even if it'll hurt her. It'll hurt her more in the end if you continue to lie to her and make her believe that you'll have a wonderful life together."

"Why couldn't we have a wonderful life together?"

"Because you want to be with a man, and don't deny it. Your eyes wouldn't wander off if you didn't."

"You aren't going to let this go, are you?"

"No, I want you to be happy, Harry. I know you don't like to talk about it, but you've sacrificed more in your life than anyone else, and I think you deserve to be happy."

"So what do you suggest I do? Break Ginny's heart? It's not like anyone's even interested in me, Hermione. I'd just end up alone."

"No, you wouldn't. There are several men who are very interested in you, including Kingsley Shacklebolt. I've already spoken to him and he's waiting to find out when he can floo you."

Harry turned bright red. "Why did you do that?"

"Because he's gorgeous and extremely keen and I don't see why you wouldn't get on splendidly." Harry didn't say anything, choosing instead to return to his breakfast. They sat in silence for a while before Hermione decided to speak again. "If you don't tell Ginny now, you'll only make it harder for her when she finds out later, you know. You won't be able to hide this forever and if it comes out in 5 years, when you're married and have children, everything will be much more painful."

Harry sighed reluctantly and put his fork down. "I know that, Hermione, but it's a lot easier to keep things the way they are."

"I've never know you to take the easy way out, why start now?"

"I…" Harry sighed, defeated. "I don't know, Hermione. If you think it's best, I'll tell her. I want her to be happy."

"I do think it's best, but because it will ultimately make you happy, and as much as I love Ginny, you are my concern." She leaned over the table and kissed his cheek, patting his wrist. "I love you, Harry, and I just want you to be happy. Let me know when you're ready and I'll tell Kingsley to floo you, all right?"

"I will. I love you, too, Hermione." They shared a brief hug and Hermione floo'd out, leaving him to his thoughts.

* * *

It took a week for Harry to gather the courage to tell Ginny, but Hermione found out almost immediately after he did. Ginny had been incredibly upset, having put all her hopes and dreams in one basket and then given it to Harry. It had been stupid of her, really, in Hermione's opinion. She should have noticed his wandering eye much sooner than Hermione herself had. Harry had been her boyfriend, after all. That was why when Ron burst into his flat, spitting angry, yelling about how he was going to kill Harry and how dare he hurt his little sister like that?!, Hermione had to hide her exhalation of relief behind her hand so as not to make Ron worse. After a long, heated debate, Ron finally relaxed enough to accept what was being told to him, though he was still unhappy about the situation.

It was another month before Harry indicated to Hermione that he was ready to start something with Kingsley. He spent that month secluded on his reservation with little contact with the outside world except for visits to the local vet and one run-in with Professor Snape in the Forbidden Forest while retrieving a wandering thestral.

Snape sneered at him as soon as he saw him and made a snide comment about letting his beasts roam free. Harry tried to brush the comment off and continued to amplify the scent of blood coming from the small clabbert he'd brought to entice the lost thestral. "Shouldn't you be terrorizing First years or something?"

"I don't have Gryffindors or Hufflepuffs on Wednesdays; a wonder I owe a great deal to Minerva for, I'm sure."

"Still doesn't explain why you're walking in the forest."

"As foreign a concept as this may be for you, this forest is teaming with potions ingredients. I am harvesting what I can." There was a rustling noise and both men turned to see the missing thestral poke his head out of the brush. He appeared to sniff the air for a moment before zeroing in on the carcass.

"Afternoon, Albert," Harry greeted, moving to pet his beak. Snape eyed the creature warily and Harry smiled at the weariness. "He's harmless, Snape, you don't need to be afraid of him." He got a sneer for his effort and turned back to Albert. "As soon as you're finished, we're going back to the reserve. I know you like the forest, but it isn't safe anymore." He made sure that his voice was soothing and that he kept stroking the velvety spine. Usually the thestrals were self-sufficient enough not to need this sort of comfort, but Albert was older and seemed to enjoy the coddling. He was startled to feel a warmth behind him and turned to see Snape standing close, reaching for Albert's ribs. Snape's eyes were focused on the thestral, so Harry tried to ignore the heat of having a body so close to his and turned back to Albert, who was nearly finished eating.

"What made you take in these thestrals, Potter? They are not exactly popular animals. In fact, one might make the case that being surrounded by such creatures is decidedly morbid."

Harry turned back around, surprised by the question. After Voldemort, no one had questioned his motives for moving to his secluded house and taking in the thestrals. He was unsure of how to answer, but something in Snape's patient gaze made his lips loosen and he was suddenly speaking. "They make me feel closer to Hagrid. He was my first friend and, in a way, my savior, and I miss him a lot. Taking care of the thestrals feels like something he would want me to do. He cared a lot for them and now that he's gone, they don't have anyone to take care of them. I had all that money from the Ministry and I liked the solace of the reservation. It's peaceful. I know they look like creatures out of Hell, but I think they're beautiful." Snape raised an eyebrow at the last and Harry hurried to explain. "Not conventionally beautiful, but their fur is like velvet and they're so graceful when they move. I can't keep my eyes off them sometimes."

"They distract you from everything else, don't they?"

"Yes."

"Is this why you've left Miss Weasley?"

Harry averted his eyes back to Albert, who had long-since finished eating. "We should go. Emmy will need to eat soon." He climbed onto Albert's back, nodded goodbye to Snape, and they were headed back to the reserve. In the back of his mind, Harry knew that it was rude to have left so abruptly, but he wasn't ready to talk about Ginny or his bisexuality and especially not with his former professor.

It was a few more weeks before he was comfortable enough to let Hermione talk to Kingsley, but it wasn't four hours before Kingsley firecalled and asked him to dinner. They were to meet at a small restaurant off Diagon Alley the next night, but Harry was so nervous he nearly cancelled three times before Hermione showed up at his door an hour before he was to go. She shuffled him into his bedroom and immediately picked out the tightest pair of trousers in his armoire.

"But I haven't worn those since Fifth Year!" he protested as she bodily wrestled him out of his loose-fitting work jeans.

"They'll fit, you haven't got any taller." He shot her a glare at the insult on his height, which she dutifully ignored. Before he knew what was happening, she'd squeezed him into the trousers and stepped back to admire her handiwork.

"I can't move," he complained, trying to take a step but only succeeding in nearly toppling over.

Hermione rolled her eyes and waved her wand at the trousers and suddenly his circulation returned. "Kingsley's going to be salivating over you."

Harry scowled and moved over to examine himself in the mirror. "I look ridiculous. No one wears trousers this tight, Hermione, you can't seriously think I'll wear them tonight." A minor argument ensued, but still, half an hour later Harry found himself standing in front of the restaurant in his painted-on trousers. He tried to block out the image of Hermione's smug face as he'd left and was successful only when he caught sight of Kingsley and nearly swallowed his tongue. Kingsley visibly checked him out before moving to his side and right into his personal space. "Good evening."

"Hi," Harry all but whispered, so nervous his hands were shaking.

"You look amazing. Thank you for agreeing to come; I know you're probably very nervous, but you needn't be. I plan to take very good care of you."

Not knowing how to respond, Harry only smiled and allowed Kingsley to escort him into the restaurant. The dinner went well despite Harry's nervousness. Kingsley did most of the talking, which gave Harry plenty of time to relax and get used to being on a date with a man he'd been having sporadic wet dreams about since he was fifteen. And by the time Kingsley was asking to escort him home, Harry was settled enough to ask him inside for a drink. Before he knew it, he was sitting on the couch with a glass of firewhiskey and Kingsley was leaning in to kiss him. The entire date had felt like it sped by him, but this, this felt as though time had stopped moving. He felt Kingsley's tongue trace his bottom lip and opened to him, kissing back in earnest.

Kingsley's kiss was like a fire, intoxicating, all-consuming; it felt like flames were spreading out through Harry's bloodstream to engulf his entire body. His hand moved to the back of his date's neck and was struck by the strength under his fingers. Kissing Ginny had never felt like this, this intense, this… right. That was it; it felt right to be kissing another man like this, to be pressed into the couch cushions, to be guided there. As Kingsley deepened the kiss, Harry found himself becoming lost.

* * *

Harry woke the next morning to a nudging at his elbow and peered up at little Emmy's sharp beak poking at him. He sighed and lazily petted her, trying to gather his thought before getting up to feed her. He felt a hand brush against his side and turned to look at Kingsley, sprawled out next to him, still asleep. His dark skin glowed in the morning light peeking through the blinds and he looked like the most delectable thing Harry had ever seen. He was tempted to stay in bed, but another poke from Emmy reminded him that he could not. Careful not to wake his lover, he slipped out of bed and pulled on his pants before taking Emmy into the kitchen to fetch her a few rats.

He leaned against the counter, blindly staring at Emmy eating, distracted by his thoughts. He had been certain that everything would change as soon as he slept with a man, but the only difference he felt was soreness in his bum. He was still himself, still being woken up at the crack of dawn by his insistent thestral cult who refused to move back out onto the reserve; nothing had changed. But was this the right decision? Was the way he felt when he was with Kingsley worth the pain he had caused Ginny? And what about the media attention this was going to bring to him? He had managed to dodge the media after the war by moving to his remote home and surrounding himself with supposedly dark, evil animals, but Kingsley lived in London and worked at the Ministry. There would be no hiding a relationship between them.

He was distracted from his thoughts by a sharp knock at the door and went to open it, unconscious of his near nudity. He was stunned to see Snape standing at his door, looking uncomfortable. "Yes?" he asked.

"Potter," he greeted, nodding at him before averting his eyes. Harry was too confused to try and figure out why. "As much as it grieves me to say so, I am in need of your assistance. I am brewing a potion that requires thestral blood and the apothecary I normally go to is out of stock at the moment."

Harry stared at him in shock. He hadn't had enough sleep, he was sure of it. He hadn't really just heard Snape admit he needed his help. "You want thestral blood?"

Snape looked as though it pained him to have to communicate with such an imbecile. "Yes, I believe I had just stated so."

"How much do you need? You aren't killing any of them."

"Of course not, I only require a quarter of a pint. Hagrid used to procure it for me regularly."

"Then, why haven't you asked me before?"

"I believed you despised my presence and would rather assist the Dark Lord."

Harry rolled his eyes and nodded inside. "Come on, then. I have to go and check on the herd anyway." He turned back into the house and went to pull on his work clothing only to realize to his horror as soon as he walked into his room that he'd answered the door and spent five minutes talking to Snape in only his underwear. No wonder Snape had been uncomfortable! He quickly pulled clothing on, making sure to remain quiet, and went back out to meet Snape. He was surprised to find that the professor was petting Emmy, who was nudging her beak into his stomach and making contented whining noises. Kingsley had been wary of the miniature thestral and had avoided her even when she made moves to get him to pet her. Harry wasn't sure how he felt about Snape's apparent ease with the animal.

"You can't use Emmy. She's only three months old and she's just got over an injury."

Snape looked up at him, obviously relieved that he'd dressed. "I need an adult sample. Why is this one not outside?"

"She refuses to go. I think I might have spoiled her by keeping her inside while her leg healed," he explained as he led his former professor to the back. Emmy followed as far as the back door, but turned away from stepping outside. "See? She acts like she's allergic to grass or something."

"Perhaps if you levitated her and then locked her out, she would re-assimilate to the outdoors."

Harry stared at him in horror. "I couldn't do that, she's just a baby. It would traumatize her."

"Potter, this is a thestral, not a puppy. You can not traumatize a thestral. You act as though the thing were your pet."

Harry glared at him, but ignored the last of his comment. Thestrals weren't pets, but little Emmy held a special place in his heart and he wasn't about to deny her comfort. "I'm not doing it. She'll grow out of this and join the herd when she's ready. For now, I kind of like having her in the house."

"She doesn't make a mess?" He sounded surprised to hear it.

"No, she's fairly quiet most of the time, doesn't get excited often."

"I was rather referring to her excrement, actually."

"They don't produce any, at least not in the usual way. They sweat everything out, something to do with their magic, though what I couldn't say. It's rather convenient for having her inside, though."

Snape nodded and the conversation died out as Harry concentrated on looking for fresh tracks. He knew the general area the herd would be in at this time of the morning, but it took recognizing fresh hoof prints to actually locate them. Within ten minutes, though, they'd discovered them and Harry indicated the strongest one, not certain how Snape intended to draw the blood. He only hoped it didn't involve a knife.

Snape stunned Reginald and approached him cautiously, aware of his agitated fellow thestrals. Harry reassured them with gentle words, but a few of the younger females still looked as though they might bite. "I would work quickly. His mating partners can be a bit aggressive."

Snape didn't indicate that he'd heard him, but he pressed the tip of his wand to Reginald's throat and held it there for a minute before backing away and releasing the stunning spell. He turned to Harry with a nod. "That is all I need, thank you."

Harry was confused. Where had the blood gone? "Did you get it?"

"Yes, I did." To Harry's surprise, he reached into his robes and pulled out a full vial of red liquid.

"That was easy. Mind waiting a few minutes while I check everyone out and then I can walk you back to the house?" Snape nodded and stood back while Harry wandered among the herd, cautious of their agitated state. Ten minutes later, he'd assured himself that everyone was in good health and turned back to Snape with a smile. "Everything looks good, let's head back." Suddenly Snape's eyes went large and before Harry knew what was happening, he'd been tackled to the ground and felt the sensation of apparition. He stared up at Snape, whose tense, panting body covered his, eyebrows raised and unable to speak.

"You should have been paying more attention. One of the more agitated females was about to tear a section out of your stomach."

Harry's eyes widened in horror before a grin spread across his lips. "I knew you had a thing for saving my life," he joked, grinning up at Snape like a loon.

Snape made a derisive sound in his throat and pushed off of Harry, scowling as he stood and brushed off his robes. "Don't be ridiculous, I would have done the same for anyone."

Harry held back a laugh at the glare he was receiving and climbed to his feet, accidentally moving closer to Snape than he'd intended to in the process. "I'm sure you would, what with your unending compassion for the human race, and all."

"Indeed," he dead-panned, but his expression had softened considerably as he looked down at Harry and from Harry's position he almost looked pleased. There was a tension in the air, Harry could feel it, but he wasn't meant to find out what exactly caused the tension, because at that moment the back door opened and Kingsley stuck his head out.

"There you are, I was getting worried you'd left without waking me." He looked surprised to see Snape, but smiled in greeting. "Morning, Severus. What brings you here this early in the morning?"

Snape raised an eyebrow at Harry and Harry's stomach floated into his throat. He hadn't come out to anyone outside his immediate social group and he'd blatantly avoided telling Snape his reasons for leaving Ginny when he'd asked. This wasn't precisely what he'd envisioned for Snape finding out, though how he had envisioned it, Harry wasn't quite sure. Snape didn't appear to be too perturbed, though, just surprised. "I was in need of thestral blood for a potion and Harry was kind enough to allow me access to his thestrals." He turned to Harry. "Thank you, again. I'll leave you to your guest now. I apologize if I've interrupted anything."

"You, er… you didn't interrupt anything. And you're welcome. You can come back any time if you need more."

"Indeed, I might be back soon. Good day." He turned and nodded to Kingsley before apparating away. Harry stood in tense silence for a few moments before Kingsley joined him on the grass, naked but for his pants, and pulled him in for a good morning kiss.

"Why do you look as though you've just seen a boggart?"

Harry furrowed his brows for a moment in confusion before smiling and shaking his head. "Nothing, I just hadn't told Snape that I was gay. I didn't know how he was going to react."

"Well, you needn't have worried. He's of our persuasion himself, you know," Kingsley murmured back before sucking Harry's ear into his mouth. Harry gasped in surprise and clung to his shoulders, feeling himself harden at the contact.

"He is? I didn't know that."

"Indeed, but enough talk about Severus. Why don't we return to bed? I wasn't finished ravishing you last night and I would very much like to continue." He squeezed Harry's bum for emphasis, making Harry squeak and cling to him harder.

"Inside sounds like a good idea." Kingsley had picked him up and was heading back for the house before he'd even finished his sentence.

* * *

The relationship progressed quietly as the weeks and then months went by. The reserve became Kingsley's second home, where he spent his weekends and most of his weeknights, at least when he wasn't out working. Harry got used to having him there, in his bed, and he began to understand what Hermione had said about never being content with Ginny if he wanted to be with a man. There was a connection that ran deeper in his relationship than anything he ever had with Ginny, a better understanding of each others' wants and desires. And Kingsley kept his promise from their first date. He did everything in his power to take care of Harry, to guide him through the uncertain territory that was his first homosexual relationship.

There was only one real source of tension in their relationship, and that tension's name was Emmy. Even as she grew to nearly her full size and her wings began to get in the way of things, Emmy still refused to go outside. Harry was too soft-hearted to force her, but Kingsley quickly began to show his frustration with the situation. The first sign of his true dislike of the animal, and Harry's first real look at Kingsley, happened one weekend just before Kingsley was scheduled to leave the country on a work assignment.

They were entangled on the couch, Harry straddling Kingsley's hips, and had been that way, snogging, for a good half an hour when Harry felt a rather sharp nip at his arm. He turned from nibbling on Kingsley's ear only to be greeted by Emmy's beak in his face. Kingsley's hand pushed her away just as Harry was moving to pet her beak and Harry turned to him instead with an injured look. "Hey, watch how you treat her. She's just a baby."

"It's a dangerous animal that's nearly full-grown and it needs to be put outside where it belongs. It's interrupting." Harry pushed himself off of Kingsley and off the couch, patting the thestral's head with eyes narrowed at his previous seat. Kingsley sat up, bemused. "Where are you going?"

"To feed Emmy. She was interrupting because it's time for her dinner." He didn't wait for Kingsley to respond before heading to the kitchen, Emmy trailing after him.

Kingsley soon followed after, a look of contrition on his face as he approached a glaring Harry, leaning against the counter. "I'm sorry to have upset you, love. I just think it's time you put the animal outside. It needs to be with its herd and not in the house, knocking over your things with those massive wings." Kingsley's voice was as seductively low as ever and he took advantage of Harry's momentary weakness upon hearing it to trap his young lover against the counter with his body. "You understand that it's a wild animal and not your pet, don't you love?"

Harry glared and straightened, attempting to remove himself from the confined space between Kingsley's arms and legs. "I understand perfectly well that she is not a pet, but I am her caretaker and I don't want to upset her and make her not trust me. She'll go out when she's ready, probably when she goes into heat soon. Until then, there's nothing important in her way and I like her here. Do you understand that?"

Kingsley sighed, recognizing that he was not going to win the fight and nodded his head. "Yes, love. If that is what you wish, then I will not interfere anymore."

Harry relaxed and smiled up at him. "Thank you. That's all I ask."

"You're welcome. Now, has she been sufficiently fed?"

"Yes, she's been fed."

"Then might I suggest we continue where we left off?" His lips lifted in a smirk as he lowered them to Harry's throat. Harry let out a soft moan and wrapped his arms around Kingsley's neck, his hands rubbing up over his smooth, bald head. In his mind, he hoped that the issue would die then.

* * *

Unfortunately, it did not. Even after Emmy finally decreed herself a creature of the forest and stepped outside, Kingsley continued to show a distaste for the thestrals that littered the reserve. It became a tear in their bond, a snag that only grew larger when their relationship was finally discovered by the public. They had miraculously managed to keep out of the papers for several months before they were outed by a restaurant worker late in January and were forced to endure dozens of reporters and cameras at every street door or window connected to Kingsley's London flat until finally, they decided to only meet at Harry's home. For reasons Harry blamed on his thestrals, the reporters rarely came to the reserve, and secluding their relationship to the remote location ensured their privacy for a while.

The reprieve was short-lived though, as the mounting pressures of the media turned what was a small argument over animals into an all-out battle that ended with a slammed door and a heart-broken Harry standing alone in his kitchen, fighting back tears. They parted ways that night, deciding that what good they had together was not enough to repair the damage of what they'd said to one another. Kingsley returned to his London life, and Harry hid himself away at his reserve once more and licked his wounds in private.

Hermione was disappointed to hear that the relationship had failed, but as she was neck-deep in books at Oxford, she could barely remember her own name, let alone Harry's Floo address. Ron was better at being there in his own way. Though the Ministry kept him busier than was probably healthy, he managed to invite Harry to the pub every other weekend. The first time, Harry was more than happy to meet him at the Three Broomsticks, pleased to be out of the house and distracted from his own brooding thoughts for the time being.

Ron arrived a few minutes late, but he had Dean Thomas with him, so that was all right. Harry grinned and shook Dean's hand vigorously. "Dean, how are you? I haven't seen you since we left school. You look good, filled out a bit."

Dean grinned back. "You look good, too, Harry. How's the reserve? I heard you've taken up with a bunch of thestrals."

"They keep the gawkers away and they don't shite everywhere. Kind of nice, actually."

"Yeah, but doesn't it give you the creeps? Just seeing one makes me go a bit wobbly, thinking about the people I had to see die so that I can see them, you know?"

Harry shrugged and took a pull off his pint. "Not as morbid as you would think. They're gentle most of the time, and when they're not I stay away. I don't mind their reputation much."

"Harry had one living inside for the longest time; couldn't get her to leave the house, could ya, Harry?" Ron said as he handed Dean a pint and took up his own.

Dean looked incredulously from Ron to Harry. "In the house? Was that safe?"

Harry laughed at the look on his face. "Of course it was safe. She was just a foal  
and she'd broken her leg. I had to bring her in the house to watch her and once she was in, she didn't want to leave."

"And it didn't bother you?"

"No, I liked having her there. She's really sweet and quiet and she followed me around like a puppy. It was kind of cute. But then she went into heat and nearly broke my back door trying to get to one of the colts. Snape thought it was hilarious." He smiled at the memory of the afternoon. He had never seen Snape laugh before then and the man had nearly bent himself in half with laughter over the exuberance of the little filly. She had barreled into the back screen door, wings extended, but hadn't made it more than a few inches before Harry had scrambled to let her out.

"Snape? How did Snape know about it?" Dean's voice interrupted his thoughts and brought him back to the pub and the realization that neither Dean nor Ron knew that Snape had become a regular at his home.

"He was over for tea. He comes by every once and a while to harvest potions ingredients from the thestrals and we have tea." Harry tried to make his voice sound nonchalant, but he could see that both of them were incredulous that he was having tea with their most hated professor.

"You have _tea_ with Professor _Snape_? Why?" Ron asked, scandalized. Dean looked as though he couldn't comprehend what he was hearing.

"Why not? He's good company, once you get to know him. And it isn't as though I get many visitors, what with everyone being afraid of the animals." The looks both men were giving him told him that they weren't convinced. He sighed and took another sip of his pint. "Let's change the subject. How's work going for you?" He turned his question to Dean, who seemed to light up at the chance to talk about his job.

"Bloody brilliant, mate! I get to draw all day long and my boss is fantastic--" He was cut off by a rough nudge by a tall, skinny, well-dressed man.

"Mr. Potter, lovely to see you out after such a terrible break-up with Auror Shacklebolt. How are you coping?"

Harry stared at the man in shock. Had he really just asked that? Who was this man and why was he bothering them? Suddenly, his eyes caught the flash of a quick quotes quill on a parchment floating just behind the man's right shoulder and dread sunk into his stomach. A reporter. Bloody Hell, he hadn't even been out half an hour and he was already caught. "I'm just fine, thank you. Not particularly your business, though. Could you please leave us alone? We're just trying to have a drink and catch up."

"Just fine, you say? So the break-up hasn't bothered you at all? Weren't you in love with Auror Shacklebolt? Isn't it true that he cheated on you with another Auror?" It was as though Harry hadn't said a word about his intrusion. The man intended to continue to bombard him with questions regardless of his wishes. The man got a hard shove from Ron for his trouble.

"He told you to bugger off. Why don't you do it before we hex you, you cunt?"

The reporter turned to Ron with a pleased expression on his face, almost feral-looking. "I see that the rumors of your violent tendencies are true, Mr. Weasley. Isn't it also true that you've been known to violently abuse Miss Granger? I have it on good authority that she has had to seek medical treatment from some of your injuries." That set Ron right off, and before Harry or Dean could stop him, he had punched the man in the mouth so hard he was knocked off his feet. The next thing the three of them knew, they were out on their arses for fighting and told not to come back until they'd sobered up. Never mind that none of them were particularly drunk or even tipsy. They ended up spending the evening on Harry's couch, sharing a bottle of Ogden's Finest and commiserating about the unfairness of letting ex-Slytherins run their favorite pub.

After that, Harry didn't take Ron's offers up very often, knowing that reporters like the tall, skinny man still had a tendency to follow him about (more than ever, if truth were told, while they all fought to be the first to discover any possible new love interest of his), and he didn't like the exposure.

* * *

And so in his seclusion, Snape became his only companion. It started simply enough; Snape came once or twice a week for thestrals ingredients. After a while, Harry began inviting the man to tea whenever he could. At first it was rare that Snape accepted the invitation, but as the weeks went by, he began to accept more and more invitations until tea became a bi-weekly event for them.

During one such occasion they were sitting in the living room, talking about the changes Hogwarts had gone through, when in a lull of conversation, Harry became compelled to ask his guest about his love life. He hadn't planned to do so. He hadn't even been aware that he wanted to know, but one minute he was silent, and the next his mouth was moving without any thought from his brain.

"Aren't you ever lonely?"

"Lonely?" came the surprised answer.

"For a companion. I realize I don't see everything or even most of what you do, but you've never given any indication that you might have a lover or even a close friend. Don't you get lonely living all alone in those dungeons with only the students to keep you company?"

For a moment it appeared as though he might not answer, and Harry was beginning to regret having asked. But then the older man set down his tea cup and his voice was almost uncertain. "I get along very well with several of my colleagues, and you and I have developed a… friendship of sorts, at least I like to think so. I don't need much else. Why do you ask?"

"I was just wondering. I know it gets lonely here sometimes without anyone to talk to, especially at night. Haven't you ever wanted to be with anyone?" Harry knew he shouldn't be asking these questions, that they were none of his business, but he somehow couldn't stop himself from asking and found that he truly wanted to know.

"I learned a long time ago not to delude myself with fantasies of the flesh. I am… unappealing to those of either sex. There is no reason for me to believe that anyone would want me."

Harry was surprised that he would say so and even more surprised at what came out of his own mouth next. "I don't think that's true. You're very attractive, in your own way. No, you don't look like those blokes on the cover of Wizard's Quarterly or Spellman, but you've got your own appeal. I don't see why anyone able to see past the obvious wouldn't find you quite handsome." Snape looked as shocked by his statement as he himself was, and had apparently been rendered speechless. Dread filled Harry as the realization of what had just spilled from his mouth caught up to him and he stuttered out an apology as quickly as he could. "I'm so sorry; that was completely uncalled for. I don't know what I was thinking; I hadn't intended to say that. I had no right to speak to you that way."

There was a minute of silence before Snape responded, in which Harry hung his head and began worrying a rip in his worn, work jeans. "I thought we'd come to an understanding, Potter, a… friendship. I should have known that you'd only invite me to tea to insult me. I'll be on my way, now." He moved to stand and Harry, suddenly panicked, grabbed his wrist to stop him.

"No, don't go. I'm sorry I was forward with you, but I wasn't trying to play a joke." He looked back down at his lap nervously. "What I mean to say is I hadn't known I thought that way, but now that I've said it, I realize I do. You aren't conventionally good looking, no, but I like you. And I don't see why, with time to get to know you, anyone else wouldn't find you attractive as well."

There was another pause in which Harry fidgeted, but he didn't let go of Snape's wrist. "Potter, are you coming on to me?"

Harry's head snapped up to search his face, confused. Was he coming on to Snape? Did he want Snape? Was this really what he'd been looking for all along? He was only a little surprised by the answer he gave. "Yes."

"Potter, if you're doing this as a joke…"

Harry smiled, suddenly completely sure of what and whom he wanted. "My name is Harry." He leaned in and pressed his lips to Snape's before Snape could respond and a rush of warmth and excitement went through him. This was exactly what he wanted and exactly where he was supposed to be. It took a moment, but soon Snape was kissing back, a soft pressure against his lips. The kiss didn't last long, just a taste before both pulled back, but the moment was enough to decide him.

Snape watched him warily, hesitant to believe that what had happened was real and that Harry had wanted it. Harry beamed at him and rubbed circles into the skin Snape's wrist until Snape appeared to relax slightly. "Still think this is a joke?" he teased.

"I am unsure what to think. I certainly never entertained the idea that you might ever find me attractive. Are you certain you do?"

Harry laughed and leaned over once more to steal another quick kiss. "Very sure. I never really thought about it before, but we're sort of perfect for each other, don't you think? Both of us are practically hermits surrounded by dark things. For different reasons, of course, but still. I think we understand each other better than anyone else would be able to understand either of us. And I do find you attractive, sexy even, though I never would have expected it when I was younger."

For a moment, Snape didn't say anything, only stared hard at Harry as though he were deciding how much of what Harry said was truth and how much utter lies. "If you are indeed being honest, then I would be amenable to attempting a relationship. Provided, of course, that it was conducted in private so that my name is not splashed all over the papers before anything serious has developed. Obviously, media attention is inevitable, but I would prefer not to be involved in the sort of scandal associated with your relationship with Shacklebolt."

"I don't want that either. As long as we don't go down to the pub, though, I think we'll be all right."

"Perhaps." That seemed to be the extent of the topic. They shared a smile and another kiss and then settled once more into comfortable conversation. For the most part, nothing changed, except that Severus often put his arm around the back of the couch and Harry often settled into the crook of said arm. There was kissing, but nothing serious at the beginning. Neither wanted to go too fast and they found the slow build to be more arousing than falling into bed together right away.

* * *

Soon, though, they were standing in front of Harry's bedroom door, watching each other for any sign of hesitation. Severus, for Harry had begun to call him Severus in the weeks previous, moved closer until his body was near flush with Harry's and they shared a slow, sensual kiss. Harry's hand moved to the door handle, and then they were in the room and slowly stripping each other of clothing, kissing every inch of available skin.

"Get on the bed," Snape murmured against Harry's lips, nudging him sideways until his knees hit the edge and he climbed backwards onto it. Severus took the time to remove the rest of his own clothing before meticulously removing Harry's, shoe by shoe and trouser leg by trouser leg until he lay back in only his pants, looking up at Severus as though he wanted to devour him. With a sensual smirk, Severus slipped onto the bed, moving between open legs and over Harry until their mouths met once more in a kiss more heated than ever before. Harry moaned and arched into him, burying fingers in long, black hair, cleaned upon his request. They moved together, hips riding out a rhythm familiar and yet new. After a while, their mouths parted and they spent a moment just looking into each other's eyes.

"Do you love me?" Harry whispered, voice almost desperate with need.

"I have loved you for years without being able to say it." Severus's voice was deep, intense, and filled with unmitigated passion. Harry nodded his understanding and took his mouth again.

"I love you, too."

Severus trailed his lips down Harry's neck and chest, fingers digging into the elastic of his pants before sliding them down his legs and off. He moved back up to Harry's lips and devoured him, hands burrowing into hair and legs wrapping around his waist. Soon they were lost in each other and the feel of skin on skin for the first time.

* * *

Epilogue

Seven years later…

Harry stood at the edge of a clearing, watching as the thestrals he had given a home to for a decade mingled and explored their new surroundings. Harry felt a bit empty watching them, almost as though they were his children and he was sending them off into the world to never return again. The thought was ridiculous, of course. They weren't his children, they were wild, feral animals (for the most part, Emmy still occasionally found her way into the house to both his and Severus's chagrin), and it wasn't as though he had taken them to live in Russia. They were only an apparition point away and he could visit them with Severus whenever his lover needed to harvest from them.

As though he had been summoned by Harry's mere thought, Severus appeared at his back, fingers running comfortingly down his arms. "How are they adjusting?"

"Fine, they don't seem to be having any problems. It's odd though, as if I'm giving away my children or something, you know? I don't like it." He turned his frowning face to that of his lover and got a peck on the lips for his trouble.

"You may not like it, but it is what's best for them. They need to be in this forest; they belong here. You know they do. And it isn't as though you cannot see them whenever you need to. You can accompany me when I come for ingredients, after all. And I'm certain one or two of them will wander back to your reserve before they've completely settled."

"I know. It's just… I don't know. What am I going to do now? I don't have any animals to mind and we've already agreed not to adopt any children. I'll have to get a job or something just to keep myself occupied while you're teaching."

"Minerva has been rather persistent in acquiring your services for the Care of Magical Creatures position now that Metta has retired."

"There is that… Do you think I would be good as a professor?"

"I think you would be excellent at anything you put your mind to." Harry smiled warmly up at him and took his hand, leaning up for another, longer kiss.

"You wouldn't mind me underfoot all the time? You know I wouldn't be able to resist bothering you every minute we're both out of class."

Severus returned his smile and squeezed the fingers entwined with his. "I think I could find a way to tolerate you." Harry grinned and dropped his hand to wrap his arms around his neck and recapture his mouth. Severus let out a soft groan and pulled him in tight by the hips, fingers splaying out against his arse.

"Mmm, why don't you take me home and show me just how much you can tolerate my presence?"

Severus growled and attacked his lips, apparating them away with a loud pop that unsettled the thestrals, who all looked up at the empty space they had just been standing in. After a moment of hoof shuffling and rustled wings, all were settled and the wood fell once more into peace.


End file.
